Where does one find the balance?

I am up from a long nap as I write this entry ...

Was up until the wee hours last night, er, early this morning, Wednesday, working on my website and fund-raiser. Trying to get enough done to give to my web designer who himself is squeezed for time too. Was up so late that another runner colleague who gets up early was surprised, but not too much, to find me online and she bid me good morning on MSN. I should stop this habit of going to sleep after people get up in the morning. Well, I got my two hours sleep and then had to get up and finish prepping for a Fido commercial. Needless to say, I sorely paid for my lack of sleep today and did not train at all.

What horrible weather today! It took me over two hours to get downtown, 9-10km ... rain, ice, police, firemen, accidents, stalled cars, overflowing sewers, blocked-off and closed streets. I was lucky the audition people didn't say anything about my being uber-late. The cameraman told me that he even got in late, and the director didn't even make it in at all because he got into an accident when his car slid.

I can't believe anyone was able to run outside today in those icy streets!

Well ... the recent lack of sleep decided to club me over the head. Been suffering from a headache all day. Had a massage this afternoon, care of a friend's b-day present to me. I was impressed with how many knots I had in my butt muscles. I contemplated going for an easy swim tonight, but thought that I might be wasting all that deep tissue work the massotherapist did on me, and of course, that idea got really nixed when I passed out on the couch from exhaustion.

Alright, I do know that part of training is smart recuperation. I've never been really good with either, training or resting, probably not disciplined enough, or as a friend pointed out, I get distracted too easily and want to do too many things.

As with all my other charity races, I've always found that I had trouble balancing the necessary fund-raising part of being on a charity team vs. the necessary training for the actual event. Unfortunately f0r me and fortunately for the charity, it has always been the fund-raising part that has won out and I have raced all too many times totally undertrained. Of course though, being able to finish a marathon pales in comparison to being able to finish an Ironman. Now that scares me.

Because of all the races and miles I've already run, I know I can finish a marathon, even severely undertrained. Ironman ... well, as Gustav, my son put it ... "Oh mummy, I don't want you to drown."

So I'd better shape up and learn to rest better so I can train smarter. My real program will be arriving soon from Dirk and I'm a little leary ... Well, I'm back off to bed now, then swimming bright and early tomorrow morning (meeting Mr. Pool at 7am).